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Do you remember Chen Qiao En who played “Sticky Note Girl” Chen Xin Yi in “Fated to Love You”? This TV series became an idol drama phenomenon of the year when it first aired in 2008, the overseas rights were sold to 15 countries, and even “The Wall Street Journal” specifically wrote about this show. Therefore, audiences around the world got to know Chen Qiao En.
Chen Qiao En shared that it was purely accidental for her to become the female lead of the show, as the original actress withdrew due to the character being an unmarried mother, giving her the opportunity to perform. After that, her career soared, participating in many idol drama shootings, achieving great success, and being hailed as the “Queen of Taiwanese Idol Dramas”.
Despite repeatedly starring in romantic idol dramas, Chen Qiao En still doesn’t believe in the “tragic romance” and “mutual abrasion” portrayed in them as the kind of love she advocates. She believes that truly good love should be mutually fulfilling, not just offering help in difficult times, but also enhancing and adding color when the other shines brightly. She advocates, one should learn to love oneself before loving others, which is the most important part of any relationship.
She feels that women always have the right to choose their own way of life, at any time. While being loved by someone is beautiful, it’s more important to learn self-love. As the old saying goes: Loving yourself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. In the practice of yoga, self-love is also an ongoing theme.
But many people find that loving themselves is not easy. Many of us face challenges on the road to self-acceptance and self-love. Every day, we are bombarded by the internet and advertising, constantly being told that we are not good enough. Social media sets standards for our behavior and appearance, making people feel they must meet these standards to be recognized.
In this atmosphere, negative emotions and self-judgment are inevitable. We continuously criticize ourselves, and this criticism is mostly negative. Negative self-talk and constant comparisons with others are obstacles to our self-acceptance and self-care.
For those who wish to make better choices and change for their own health, they have taken an important step on the road to self-love. However, “change” is often to conform to societal expectations, not personal inner needs.
If you feel the motivation to change is not from within, it may be time to slow down, take a deep breath, and re-explore and accept your true self. As you strive to become a better you, remember to appreciate your inherent qualities, instead of focusing on what’s missing.
Embrace yoga, and start a beautiful love relationship with yourself. We must take action to care for ourselves because true love is not just a feeling; it is a verb that requires action. To truly realize self-love, we need to prove it through actual actions.
Imagine the various gestures you make to express care for your beloved partner, children, family, and friends. Conversely, think about how you would make the same expressions of care for yourself? Among the many forms of self-care, yoga is one practice. Yoga is not just a physical exercise; it teaches us to deeply connect with our own feelings and emotions. It guides us to understand our inner selves and accept who we are now. Through yoga, mindfulness, meditation, and breathing, the five forms introduced here aim to help us find the path to self-love and self-acceptance, thereby promoting the growth of inner strength and overall health.
These practices are beneficial for us to retract our scattered senses, focus on our inner self, and establish a deep connection with the inner depths.
Lotus Mudra
The Lotus Mudra is a gesture that guides us to open the heart chakra. It symbolizes the pure beauty of transition from darkness to light, blooming out of the mud. The lotus takes root in the mud yet blossoms towards the sunlight, reminding us that while seeking light and change, we also need to maintain a close connection with our origins. It encourages us to bring more compassion and love to ourselves and others.
Reclining Bound Angle Pose
This posture stimulates the heart and promotes circulation throughout the body. Placing hands gently on the chest and lower abdomen can connect the heart chakra with the sacral chakra. The heart chakra relates to self-love, warmth, compassion, and joy, while the sacral chakra is related to feelings, emotions, pleasure, sexuality, and intimacy. This movement helps to release and feel the deep changes within the body. In traditional Chinese medicine theory, this also means the valuable connection between the heart and kidneys.
Knee to Chest Pose
This movement is not only stretching the back and promoting digestion but also represents the meaning of self-acceptance. Tightly holding the knees and embracing them, this process helps us pull our attention from the outside world back to the inside, deepening self-care.
Eagle Pose
This balancing posture teaches us to treat ourselves gently, even when seeking balance in various aspects of life may seem difficult. Embrace yourself to experience the internal strength and tranquility, which embodies the essence of self-care.
Lord of the Dance Pose
This posture celebrates the self; it not only opens up the heart chakra but also stretches the body, spreading love to the world. Relax your body and enjoy the freedom and grace of the dance.
Next is a guided meditation that lets us reconnect with the depths of our hearts and use self-love to motivate ourselves: Find a comfortable posture, whether it’s lying down or sitting. If needed, you can lean against a wall or sit on a chair. Breathe deeply, close your eyes or gaze softly, recognize every exhale and inhale that you are breathing, feel every point of contact between your body and the support, don’t try to change, just observe.
Inhale deeply through your nose, then exhale through your mouth. Continue to breathe deeply, feeling every change in your body. In this process, be aware of your physical state.
Where do you perceive tension in your body? Is there tightness or emotional blockages? And where are your thoughts? Are they wandering, or immersed in the breath of the moment? Is the mood relaxed, or filled with unease, negativity, and doubts?
Next, place both hands over your heart, and continue to exhale and inhale through your nose. At this moment, ask yourself: How does it feel to place your hands in this area, a source of self-love and love for others? Let your breathing become more natural and relaxed, gradually shifting to inhaling and exhaling through your nose alone.
Feel the air flow into your lungs and then out, spreading into the world. With each exhalation, imagine that you’re releasing the negative thoughts that trouble you. We often easily drown in negative thinking and self-doubt, possibly without realizing that such feelings usually mask a deeper truth: a feeling of being unworthy of love.
Societal ideals constantly tell us we need to become better versions of ourselves—thinner, happier, wealthier, smarter. Despite this, we seldom believe that we’re already enough. When inner criticisms and insecurities spread, you might recall that moments of “not enough” are exactly when you most need to treat yourself with kindness.
Maintain focus on your breath. With each inhale, silently affirm “I am worthy,” and with each exhale, remind yourself “I am enough.” Let each breath be an intake of profound love for yourself, and a release of that which no longer serves you.
Spend some time maintaining this breathing, and repeating these words inwardly. Even if your mind begins to wander, there’s no need to worry. Every emotion you feel while reciting is a natural part of the psychology. When you catch yourself drifting, simply bring your attention gently back to your breathing. Notice how your thoughts drift with time, whether positive or negative, just like clouds passing in the sky.
Now, imagine standing in front of a mirror, gazing into your own eyes. What do you see? Pain, sorrow, or love and joy? No matter what emerges in your reflection, tell yourself “I love you,” “You are beautiful,” and “You deserve happiness.” Please remember, you in the mirror now may differ from what you see next time.
Imagine breathing towards your heart, with love streaming from your hands into it. Allow this love to warm your heart and diffuse to other parts of your body. Feel a sense of comfort and peace rising from the depths of your heart. This warmth rises from the chest, moves up the neck to the head, then flows down through the shoulders, arms, and hands, continuing down to the ribs, abdomen, pelvis, legs, and feet. Let this warm sensation fill your entire body.
Preserve this experience of breathing deep in your heart, knowing that once you need it, this love is always there waiting for you. As you prepare to conclude, take a few deep breaths, then slowly open your eyes, lingering for a moment in this tranquil state. Acknowledge and appreciate your inner journey, having attained a deeper understanding of your physical and emotional needs. Allow self-love to forge a stronger connection with yourself, inspiring you to be your most authentic self in every moment of life.
